


Riding in Cars with Boys

by MajorGodComplex



Category: Death Note
Genre: Alternate Universe - 1920s, Casual Fitzgerald Plagiarism, Great Gatsby AU, L in a pink suit, M/M, Mystery, Romance, The Great Gatsby - Freeform, great gatsby but gayer
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-17
Updated: 2017-03-17
Packaged: 2018-09-25 04:46:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9803171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MajorGodComplex/pseuds/MajorGodComplex
Summary: Light didn't know what to expect when he moved into a peaceful little house in the West Egg, but after attending a party hosted by the elusive L, he is swept into a life of mystery, intrigue, and romance as he learns more and more about an enigmatic detective desperate to solve the puzzle of the East Egg golden girl Misa Amane.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yes this is a Great Gatsby/Death Note AU. The first chapter is modeled very very heavily off the first chapter of Great Gatsby (including direct quotes) to capture the tone, but after this chapter it'll very much start going its own way. Imagine GG, but somehow more gay, and also with more murder. 
> 
> also, this plot was the result of an entire google doc full of ideas between me and tumblr user cathalsey, so none of this could have been written without her!
> 
> Here's a full text copy of the first chapter of The Great Gatsby, in case you want to see the original text is verses what I've changed around and done.   
> https://ebooks.adelaide.edu.au/f/fitzgerald/f_scott/gatsby/chapter1.html

_In my younger and more vulnerable years, my father gave me a piece of advice that I have cherished and turned over in my mind ever since._

_He told me, “Whenever you feel like criticizing any one, remember that all the people in the world have not had the same advantages that you’ve had.”_

_That was all he'd said, and I did not expect him to say more. My father and I have always had a relationship that needed little communication. We spoke through our actions. I did things to make him proud, and he always looked pleased, occasionally giving me pieces of advice so that I could grow in moral character. He never said much to me, but the few words we did exchanged contained enough meaning that I realized he meant much more._

_Upon thinking on it, I realized that my father was correct. I was born into a wealthy enough family, and as a result I went to Yale, the finest school this country had to offer. I have always wanted for nothing. I had a loving family, and a police officer for a father who always showed me right from wrong. Others have not been so lucky, and as a result I am naturally of a higher moral and societal standing. Still, it has never been the fault of the common man that their plight is hard._

_As a result, I make it a personal motto to never judge anyone. Although this has given me time and time again new advancements and opportunities, almost just as many times it has resulted in me being stuck listening to multiple people pour their problems out to me. I've heard several variations of the same speeches on how tragic man's small little life can be. Occasionally, I pretend to be asleep when someone comes my way, in the hopes that they will leave me alone rather than talk to my living corpse. Sometimes I pretend to be angry when I sense a confession coming, which frequently scares away anyone who might attempt to dump onto me their plagiaristic and mostly suppressive revelations. In my college days, many people accused me rather unjustly of being a politician because of my charismatic nature and the willingness others had to share with me their secrets. I, however, have never wanted anything to do with the democratic aristocracy. I like to think myself better than politics._

_Still, reserving judgement is a matter of infinite hope, and I am proud to say that I am the most honest and just man I have ever met. Not that that’s very difficult. There have been times where it has seemed to me that the whole world was rotten to the core, with only a few good people attempting to redeem it. Sometimes I feel as though (dare I say it?) I am the only good person left in a world that has gone insane._

_Now, after bragging about my tolerance, I must admit that it has a limit. A man might build his house on the rock or on the sand, but after awhile I don’t care what the house is founded on, just that I want out of it. When I came back to New York in the fall I decided that I wanted nothing more to do with that life. I wanted uniformity, beauty, and pureness that could no longer be satisfied where I was. I was tired of riotous excursions with only rare glimpses of the human heart._

_Only one man was exempt from my reaction-- L, the man who represented everything to which I have an unaffected scorn. If personality was merely a collection of independent deeds and gestures than L was a gorgeous creature. He would have brought with him all of the promises that life could give, and every time I looked at him he managed to fill me with a sense of unending hope. He was beautiful, in that sort of way. He had such a gift for it, that hope, like no one else I had ever met. He carried it with him at all times, as if hope was a little present that he never wanted to leave behind, yet at the same time was only so willing to give away. He was a passionately obsessive bastard of the like I had never seen before, and will probably never see again. But he had that fixation...that fixation which, as beautiful as it seemed to me, only caused his destruction as he sank deeper and deeper into solving the mystery that consumed his life._

_No, no, L turned out alright in the end. It was what preyed on L, that foul dust and darkness which shrouded him, followed him, and penetrated his every dream that closed off any interest I had in the pathetic sorrows, tribulations, and short-winded elations of man. Though I was idealistic then, dreaming of the possibility that perhaps the rottenness of man could be cleansed if enough good people made the effort, I have sense realized nothing short of divine judgment could fix the mess humans have made._

I lived in the West Egg-- the slightly less fashionable of the two identical egg shaped masses of land separated only by a courtesy bay-- overlooking both the bay as well as the distant East Egg neighborhoods, with their large sprawling houses and beautiful gardens.

Though my own house was a small, overlooked eyesore, directly next door to me was a mansion of ridiculous size and over-the-top opulence, which was owned by the elusive L, a name I had heard only in passing. It looked as though it could have easily been one of the great castles of Europe, out of place except that it was fashioned after a much more modern style. The house itself had towers covered in ivy, forty acres of land and gardens, and a large marble swimming pool which altogether resulted in a mansion that even the residents in the East Egg would envy.

Thinking about it now brings me back to nights of drinking, debauchery, dancing, and fineries like I hadn’t seen before, nor since. It reminds me of a summer of mystery, excitement, terror, and tragedy as I grew more and more interlocked with the story that played out right in front of my very eyes, though I suppose the story really begins with the first visit I paid to my cousin’s white palace in the East Egg during that beautiful summer when I first met L.

Misa Amane was actually my second cousin once removed, or something of the sort, and though I rarely saw her as a child and didn’t much know she existed until my later years, I went to university with her husband Higuchi and actually stayed with them a couple of nights after the war.

Higuchi was a true businessman through and through, though how he managed to hold down a job for as long as he did is still a puzzle to me considering he seemed to have all the brains of a well-educated parakeet. A member of both the football and the wrestling teams in university, he was a brawny man who still kept in shape years after graduation just in case he felt like recapturing his old glory days. He was one of those men who had managed to reach the climax of his life at 20, and spent the next 10 years nostalgically longing for “the good old days” as he spent time and time again playing at the stocks. Still, he _was_ a good businessman. I can say that about him at the very least.

Their move to the East Egg was a recent change, and one Misa had told me over the phone was a permanent one, though she was flighty as well and they had both always been prone to moving here and there wherever the wind took them to whatever neighborhood was most fashionable for those people who like to play polo and croquet whilst drinking champagne on the patio. Though I have never been that kind of person, I felt the change of scenery and relaxing air that the Eggs promised would be good for me.

Misa gave me a call as soon as I moved in, inviting me for dinner at their home, which is how I ended up driving over to the East Egg on a windy evening to visit two friends who I hardly knew at all and didn’t much care for either way.

When I arrived, I was greeted by the stony face of Higuchi smoking on the patio, his arrogant eyes and broad shoulders looking much the same as the last time I had seen him, though his face had aged as he approached 30 and his hair had greyed the slightest bit. I stood for a moment outside my car, wondering if perhaps he would greet me, or if I had to be the one to say the first hello. I was finally just about to open my mouth, when Misa came flying out the door in a white summer dress with a huge grin on her face, throwing herself into my arms and making excited noises.

“Oh Light! I’m so glad you decided to come and visit. I just _have_ to give you the full tour, you’ll love it, our new home is simply _stunning!_ ” She grabbed my hand and pulled me inside, before I had much of a chance to say anything about it.

The house was even more luxurious than I had originally imagined, I will give her that. I briefly thought to ask for the card of the architect who had designed it, before brushing the idea away. She wouldn’t have given me the opportunity to ask it, anyway, with all her chattering away about why she chose what colors she did for the drapes, the carpets, the furniture, etc. She finally concluded the tour with bringing me into the drawing room where I was greeted by two unfamiliar faces. I masked my surprise with a smile, although I was a bit miffed that she hadn’t had the foresight to tell me there would be more company than just the two of them.

“Rem, Ryuk, this is my cousin Light!” She said, ushering me into the room, “The one I was telling you about? Oh, you both will just _love_ him, he’s _such_ a dear!”

A young looking woman with long white hair who I assumed must be Rem looked up from her relaxed position on the couch to scan me over with her eyes. She looked away a moment later, chin tilting up slightly as if my presence alone in the room was an inconvenience to her. A man with wild hair and eyes that looked even wilder turned from making his drink at the bar looked me over as well, before emitting a low chuckle that was almost imperceptible to my ears.

Misa took a seat in a chair opposite the couch, gesturing for me to sit as well on the couch next to Rem. I briefly hoped that she did not have the intention to set us up, as I tended to stay away from silly notions like romance. Most idiots mess up by falling in love, and I didn’t consider myself like most idiots. In fact, I had always been the head of my class while in school. Take Misa herself, for example, she seemed to be doing fine for herself before she somehow got roped into marrying Higuchi. After that, she was nothing but unhappy, though I don’t think she even knew that herself.

Higuchi finally entered the room, somehow managing to dominate it as soon as he so much as stepped inside and took off his coat, flinging it across a chair that he proceeded to sit down in.

“This is a fine place you have here,” I said to him.

“It belonged to an oil man before I took it off his hands,” He said in his low, gruff voice.

Misa turned to me again, grabbing one of my hands and looking at me in a way that truly managed to make me feel as though there were no one else in the whole world she so much wanted to see. I’d forgotten that about her, and it explained in an instant how she always managed to maintain popularity despite not having an ounce of sense about her. It also reminded me of why I made the trip to see them in the first place, aside from the obvious familial obligations.

“Oh Light, we’ve had the grandest time living here so far. Just the other day, we met a man in Manhattan who--”

“What do you do now, Light?” Higuchi asked, cutting off his wife without so much as a thought.

“I’m a bond man. I work for Dewayne Orvil.”

“I’ve never heard of him,” he remarked. He always had a way of talking that seemed to say with every word “I’m more of a man than you.”

This annoyed me.

“Well, you’ll hear his name if you stay in the East, I can promise you that.”

“Oh, we’re staying in the East, for certain!” Misa chimed in.

“We’re staying here.” Higuchi spoke over his wife once again. “We’d be damn fools not to.”

I wished I had poured myself a drink before sitting down, so that I would at least have something to do other than look down at my hands and shift my weight in the unusually comfortable chair I sat in. I fought these urges, and instead painted an even wider smile on my face and sat up straighter in my chair.

“I’m stiff,” Rem said, rising from her place in her chair and moving to look out the window toward the bay. “I feel as though I’ve been laying on that couch all day.”

“Well I’ve been _trying_ to get you to go into the city with me, but you simply wouldn’t have it! Right Ryuk? We’ve been trying, haven’t we?”

He turned to me, saying “We have” before downing his entire glass of scotch.

This seemed to satisfy her.

“No thanks,” Rem said, “I don’t care for it.”

Now that she was standing, I was able to get more full look at the lady. She wasn’t bad to look at, and seemed to walk across the room with confidence and grace, as though she were something out of this world. Ryuk, however, was an odd looking man if I had ever seen one, seemed to walk with a spring in his step that had to have been grown by the sheer amount of alcohol that I had seen him consume just in the time I had been there. He took Rem’s seat on the couch, and she didn’t seem to mind.

“So you live in the West Egg?” Rem asked from the window, “I don’t believe I know anyone there.”

“You have to know L,” Ryuk called to her. “I could have sworn I’ve dragged you to one of his parties on more than one occasion.”

“L?” Misa said, suddenly at complete attention. “What L?”

“L…” I said aloud, more to myself than for anyone else’s benefit. “I do believe he’s my neighbor.”

Higuchi sprung from his seat, suddenly full of more energy than he had been before. “ _I_ do believe it’s time for dinner.”

Dinner was long and inconsequential, even a bit boring at times, with Misa and Rem and Ryuk dominating conversation with petty banter as Higuchi looked on in a bored sort of way, always checking his watch and thinking about something else-- perhaps his work, perhaps a girl on the side. Dinner had been served in the gardens, and although it was a beautiful evening I could not help wishing they had chosen to serve the meal indoors, as even the best weather can still have bugs and sunlight hitting all the wrong places. I moved my head to the right slightly, hoping a tree I saw in the distance would block the beam of light that seemed determined to hit me square in the eyes. I made a silent note to have any dinner parties at my house inside, assuming I had any at all.

The butler came and whispered something in Higuchi’s ear, causing him to quickly place his napkin on the table and rise from his place, swiftly moving back into the parlor. I wondered where he was going, letting my eyes follow him all the way back indoors.

“...Right Light?”

Misa had asked me something, and I couldn’t for the life of me say what that thing had been. “Uh…” I replied, “Of course.” I smiled.

“See!” She turned to Ryuk. Apparently my words had settled some small debate between them. “He’s just like a rose, isn’t he?” She announced to the whole table. “Just like a rose.”

This was completely untrue. I was not even remotely like a rose.

Still, it didn’t seem to matter, as the rest of the table was paying no attention to Misa in the slightest, but rather all had one eye focused toward the door Higuchi had exited through.

Misa rose from the table, throwing her napkin on her plate and excusing herself into the house, her face suddenly taking on a pained expression. I’m sorry that I don’t think I’m just like a rose?

“Is she alright?” I began to ask, but I was cut off by Ryuk, who shushed me.

“He wants to see if he can hear what happens,” Rem explained, looking off into the house. “I should go after her.”

She rose from the table as well, following where Misa had gone into the house.

Finally, Ryuk gave up and turned back to me. “Damn, I can’t hear a thing.”

“What are you trying to hear?” I asked.

“God, I thought you knew. I thought everyone knew. Higuchi’s got himself some woman up in New York.” He laughed, “You’d think she’d have the decency not to call him at dinner time, wouldn’t you? I love humans! Simply fascinating, am I wrong?”

“Uh…” I said, not quite sure what else to say. Not that I was surprised by Higuchi’s disgusting behavior. I would say that Misa deserved better, but if she’s stupid enough to still stay with him I suppose she deserves him in the end anyway. Not that she had many other options. A girl of her status couldn’t just run off and leave her husband, no matter how much of a scumbag he was. Then again, in these modern times I find myself being less and less surprised by immoral behavior.

I placed my napkin on the table as well, pushing my chair away and standing. “I should be leaving too.” I hated being in the middle of domestic quarrels.

I left without saying a proper goodbye to him, although I passed Misa in the hall.

I’d expected her to be crying, and I’d expected Rem to be with her, but she was alone. I was hoping she wouldn’t notice me, but there was no way I could pass by without catching her attention.

“Light?” She called. I turned to her. “Are you leaving so soon?”

I nodded.

“You never got to meet the baby.”

Ah, yes, their baby. I felt sorry for it already. I could only assume Misa was a horrible mother. She didn’t even mention the thing to me once, though I vaguely remember her mentioning it in a letter sometime in the last year.

I nodded again, “Another time.”

“Yes, another time,” She agreed. Then, after a moment, she asked “Did I ever tell you what I said after the child was born?”

No, she hadn’t, and I didn’t much care to hear it, but she didn’t wait for me to answer. She told me anyway. She always did this, which made me remember why I didn’t make the effort to see her more often. I’d forgotten that.

“My husband was god knows where after our daughter was born, and I had this sinking feeling of abandonment. I hated it. The nurse handed me my child, and said it was a girl. I said, ‘good,’ I said, ‘good I’m glad it’s a girl, and I hope she’s a fool, too-- that’s the best thing I girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool.’ That’s exactly what I said, Light.”

I didn’t know why she was telling me all this, and I _really_ didn’t care to hear it. The air was suddenly very uncomfortable. She always did know how to spoil a nice night, didn’t she? What was I supposed to do now, just leave? She was crying. Should I leave her? Could I leave a girl crying in the hall as I stormed out of the house and went upon my day? Where on earth was Rem, and what was she good for?

Suddenly, she was smiling, and I thought perhaps I had imagined the whole thing. “Anyway, I suppose you’ll be off. Do visit again soon, okay Light? Promise me you will? Promise?”

I promised her I would, and she smiled again in that way she has.

I left the house without another word.

When I finally arrived back at my estate in West Egg, I couldn’t help but notice the figure of a tall man with wild dark hair that looked like it hadn’t been brushed in a year staring out across the bay. He had both hands in his pockets, and though he seemed to be slouched over he still came across as someone confident in his purpose. I heard a noise in the bushes behind me, and I looked to see what it was, only catching the silhouette of a cat scurrying away after some creature. When I turned back again to look at the man-- who I assumed must have been L himself-- he had one arm stretched out, as if reaching for something across the bay. No longer slouched, his whole body seemed to be longing for something outside of his grasp.

In that moment, I had made up my mind to call upon him. Ryuk and Rem had mentioned him, perhaps that in itself could serve as an introduction, although I doubted I really needed one. One more look at him convinced me to wait. He seemed quite content in being alone at the moment, in fact, I believed if I tried to talk to him he might disappear completely. I shook my head. No, no I wouldn’t call upon him tonight.

I looked out across the water, hoping to catch some glimpse as to what he could be reaching toward. I saw nothing, just a single green light across the bay. When I turned once more toward where L had been standing, he was gone, and I was left alone once more.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light attends a party and searches for its mysterious host.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I actually wrote another chapter so I guess this is a real thing now.

I didn’t have to wait long for my chance to call on L. Only a few days after seeing him in the yard, I received an invitation to one of his famous (or infamous, depending on who you talked to) parties. It had taken me a very short while to experience what exactly Rem and Ryuk had been talking about, and I soon realized that every night of the summer months I would hear the music swelling and fading from over the garden wall. I would see the men and women in suits and beautiful gowns disappearing into his house only to appear again on the tower, in the pool, or drunkenly stumbling through the drive. These parties, I found, had no end time, but sometimes dragged on and on until they lasted an entire weekend.

When I first arrived, I discovered that I was probably one of the few people who had actually been invited to the party. I asked around from person to person, trying to get some sense of what this L was like. Many people, I soon discovered, didn’t even know whose house they were partying at. They were friends of a friend of a friend, or they had merely heard about a great party and had come to check it out. Several people I talked to had been going to his parties for a month without ever meeting the host.

I was wearing a beautifully tailored suit that I was quite proud of after having bought it off of a very respectable tailor in downtown Manhattan, and I was disappointed to find that I might have wasted a perfectly good outfit if I wasn’t even going to meet L after all. The few people who I did ask of L’s whereabouts looked at me like I was insane and denied any knowledge of his location. I had just began to start near a handsome waiter with a tray full of champagne when I spotted Ryuk stumbling down a marble stairway singing some sort of drinking song. I didn’t think to be embarrassed on his behalf considering out of everyone there it seemed as though he were actually one of the most normal, and I was desperate to attach myself to someone I knew before I ended up looking like some pathetic lurker.

“Ryuk!” I called, joining him. He grinned when he saw me, flashing his big teeth and getting a mischievous look in his eye.

“It’s Light, right?” He asked, “The little rosebud, himself?”

I clenched my fists, cursing Misa for branding me with what seemed to be my embarrassing new nickname, but smiled anyway. “I wouldn’t say that’s the best way to describe me, but yes.”

“Is it your first time?” He asked, looking around the room. “I think I lost Rem somewhere.”

“I’m sure she’ll find her way back eventually,” I said, wanting to change to subject to L somehow. “Have you seen the host anywhere?”

“L? No, he doesn’t show his face much around here. Odd, considering it’s his party.” He laughed. “Not that I mind it too much. A party is a party!”

A girl who had been trailing behind Ryuk earlier joined into the conversation. “Are you talking about L?”

“Yes!” I replied, “Have you met him?”

She shook her head regretfully, “No, but I want to. I hear he’s terribly handsome, and so nice, too. A dress I had ripped on a chair here, once, and he went out of his way to send me over $300 to buy myself a new one. He even had the old one fixed, too, but he sent it all via mail and I still never saw his face. There’s something odd about him, though. I just know it.”

“I heard he was a German spy during the war.” Ryuk added, taking another long sip of his champagne.

“Ryuk, are you talking about L?” Another woman joined the conversation. She stuck out her hand, apparently waiting on me to shake it. “The name is Lucille.” I shook it.

“Yes we’re talking about L,” Ryuk replied, “I was just saying that I thought he was a German spy during the war.”

“Well _I_ heard he killed a man, maybe more.” Lucille leaned in a bit closer, loving the gossip, “What kind of a name is L, anyway? It’s obviously fake. He’s hiding something, I just know it. He’s hiding something.”

“Isn’t he a detective?” I asked. I had heard it somewhere, although I couldn’t for the life of me say where the thought had come from.

“Perhaps.” The woman whose name I didn’t catch pursed her lips. “Though what he’s doing here, I have no idea.”

“He could have a torture dungeon in his basement for all I care, as long as the drinks are good and the girls are better. Throw a party like this and I don’t care what you do.” Ryuk laughed.

Lucille slapped him on the arm, but she was laughing too. “Ryuk! Behave yourself. Don’t say things like that.”

I excused myself, no longer interested in the conversation. “I’m going to go find something to eat, excuse me.”

I pushed passed another couple of groups of people, finally stumbling upon a large library with bookshelves covering every wall, reaching all the way up to the already high ceiling. I approached one, running my fingers across a shelf of books and feeling the binding on each one. The whole display was simple exquisite, and I had half a mind to take one or two and read them right now. Still, my need to find L and introduce myself to him outweighed my need to dive into his library. At that point I could have cared less about actually meeting him or having a conversation with him, I just wanted to satisfy my curiosity and I had been on the mission for much too long to give up without it feeling like another failure.

I turned to exit, but a voice from inside the library stopped me. I hadn’t even noticed someone else was there with me.

“Isn’t it incredible?” I turned around to find a man in a mediocre suit with a mop of dark hair on his head, grinning like he’d just been given a million bucks. “Even just standing in a room like this makes you feel smart, huh? Simply incredible!”

“Uh, yeah.” I replied, turning to leave.

The odd man was quick, however, and managed to grab my sleeve before I could safely get away. He was swaying back and forth a bit, so I could only assume he was either drunk or getting there quickly.

“It almost looks real, doesn’t it?” He began. “He put so much detail into the whole set that if I hadn’t known better I would have thought it was all real. The man is an artistic genius. Still, he knew when to stop, I can say that for him. The books are real, but none of them are cut. Not a single one I touched! Now _that_ would have been dedication.”

I found it odd that the books were uncut. A library that large, and L had not read a single book in the whole place. An unread book. I laughed to myself. An unread book, just like L was.

“Uh, well, it was nice meeting you…” I trailed off, not sure what to address the man.

“Matsuda! That’s my name.” He stuck out his hand to shake mine.

“It was nice meeting you, Matsuda.” I turned without shaking his hand, hearing him call something after me, but I wasn’t paying attention.

I turned down another hallway, looking through first one empty room, then another, then another. Finally, just when I was about to give up and go home, I pushed open the door to a study only to find a man inside. He was looking out a large window that overlooked the lawn. He whipped around as soon as I opened it, and although he hadn’t been doing anything, I was still tempted to apologize for interrupting him.

I knew almost as soon as I saw him that it couldn’t be anyone but L.

His eyes seemed tired, and he was both paler and much younger than I had originally expected him to be. His hair, which had looked wild and unkempt the night I had seen his silhouette on the lawn, was now slicked back and kept out of his eyes.

“I wasn’t expecting company,” He said.

I laughed. “You threw a party and you weren’t expecting company?”

“Not in here,” he replied. “Is the party not to your enjoyment? You might miss the fireworks.”

“It’s a wonderful party, truly,” I said quickly, not wanting to insult him, “But I was _very_ interested in meeting its infamous host.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Oh, so I’m infamous now, am I? And here I thought everyone loved me. I try my hardest to walk alongside the law.” He smiled, as if silently laughing at a joke he’d made.

I didn’t find it very funny.

“Well, you don’t seem to have a problem with aiding in the willful violation of prohibition.”

He took a few steps closer to me, looking me right in the eye. I saw something in his that I couldn’t quite place my finger on. “I don’t much care what the laws say, alcohol isn’t a sin. Even Jesus turned water into wine. Besides,” He took another step closer to me, until he was so close I could practically feel his breath. Then he smiled, tilting his head slightly to one side, “I can smell it on you, too.”

“The books in your library are uncut,” I said without thinking.

“They’re new, although I’m glad to see you’ve been snooping.”

“I was looking for you.”

“Well,” He took a step back and gestured to himself, twirling around a bit in a way that was almost cute. “Here I am. You’ve found me. What do you want to ask? Or would you prefer three wishes?”

Why _was_ I so eager to find him? I suppose I wanted to introduce myself, maybe have some small talk, and be on my way. Of course I made it more uncomfortable than anything else, now that it was just the two of us and he wasn’t even _attending_ his own party. He was just sitting by the window, watching the guests come and go.

“I wanted to introduce myself,” I finally said, conveying a believable amount of confidence with my tone. “I’m Light Yagami. I’m your neighbor to the left.”

“Ah, yes.” He said, nodding. “I was wondering when you would come to call. I’m L.”

I didn’t bother telling him how redundant it was to introduce himself. “You hadn’t invited me until now.”

He shrugged, “That hasn’t stopped most of the other people at this party.” He gestured to one of desk chairs. “Here, take a seat.”

“No thank you,” I said, taking a step back. “I’m comfortable enough standing.”

He looked at me for an uncomfortably long time, to the point where I thought perhaps he was considering _forcing_ me to sit and have a chat. He was studying me, and suddenly I felt as though he could see everything inside of me. Perhaps he could even see straight through me and through the wall behind me.

“You look familiar,” He said finally. “Have we met before?”

“Well, you _are_ my neighbor.” I volunteered. “I’m sure you’ve seen me from your lawn at least once or twice.”

“No, no beyond that.” He studied me for a few seconds longer. “Were you in the Third Division during the war?”

I blinked. “Why, yes. I was in the Ninth Machine-gun Battalion.”

He grinned, satisfied with discovering the truth. “I was in the Seventh Infantry until June nineteen-eighteen. I knew I’d seen you somewhere before.”

This was surprising to me, but I _was_ relieved to finally have some common ground. He gestured once again to the desk chair, and I took a seat. We spoke shortly about some wet, grey lands on the French countryside, as well as asking the obligatory questions of who we knew and where we had been.

Before I knew it, nearly an hour had passed and we were still talking. I was about to excuse myself, once I’d realized how late it had gotten. I have always needed at the very minimum 8 hours of sleep every night, and I have always kept a strict sleep schedule with only a small margin for modification of about one or two hours. Sleep is important to good health, and I for one plan to live forever. As soon as I opened my mouth to tell him so, however, he smiled at me. Unlike the patronizing smile he had sent my way when we first met, this one was much more understanding. No, more than that. It was a smile like I had never seen before, one that seemed to reassure me to the point where I felt I might never be anxious again. It was a smile that one might come across only four or five times in a life. He was concentrated on me with an irresistible prejudice in my favor, understanding me as much as I wanted to be understood, believed in me as much as I wanted to believe in myself, and finally assured me that he had exactly the best impression of myself that I had tried so desperately to convey to him. Suddenly I felt as though I wanted to tell him every secret I had ever kept, every fear I had ever helped, and explain to him every feeling of joy and loss and bliss and love and elegance that had ever crossed my mind or my heart.

Before I could say a word, Rem popped her head through the door.

“Light Yagami! Ryuk said you were here, told me he had seen you go in this direction. I’ve been looking for you. You seem to be having a gay time.” She was being sarcastic. I was separate from the party, and had been for practically the whole night. “I’m leaving soon, but I thought it would be rude if I failed to at least say hello. Misa would be ashamed of me if I had gone the whole night without saying a word to you, I fear she wants us together.”

I looked back at L, and the understanding smile had vanished, now replaced with a much more desperate look. “Misa? Do you know her?”

“She’s my cousin,” I explained, before turning back to Rem. “Thank you, it was wonderful seeing you. If my cousin asks, you can tell her we had a grand time together.”

L turned to me, “If you’ll excuse me, I must have a few words with Rem. It was wonderful meeting you, old sport!” He gave me a slap on the back that was perhaps a little _too_ hearty. “And don't forget about lunch next week, alright?”

Lunch? Had we made plans for lunch? Before I could say another word, he had ushered me out of the room gave me a large push in the direction of the rest of the party goers.

I wandered back out toward where most of the party seemed to be taking place. If anyone had been remotely sober by the time I first went looking for L, they certainly weren't sober anymore. I walked past a woman slapping her husband for making eyes at some pretty young girl. He looked ready to hit her back as he told her he could do whatever he damn well pleased. I made a disgusted face and turned up my nose. These people were a fucking mess.

I decided it wasn’t worth lingering around, and began the walk back to my house, spotting a few sad souls who’d had an unfortunate tumble into the swimming pool earlier in the night. I saw some other sad sap had wrecked his car into a tree. Upon closer look, it appeared to be that Matsuda guy from the library. Probably driving intoxicated.

I finally made it through the crowd and across the cut grass back home again, taking one long look back at L’s house. He’d finished with Rem, apparently, as I could see his figure standing alone peering out the window of the room I had met him in, as if waiting for someone who’d never arrive.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light has a lunch date with Higuchi, Higuchi's mistress, and all Higuchi's mistresses friends. Light realizes it's not actually a lunch date, but a party that he has no way home from. Light drinks.

I am afraid that I am giving you the impression that my whole summer was consumed by L, however this was not the case, as I still maintained many other interests, and definitely spent most of my time doing some of my many other important hobbies. I continued to make work and my job a priority, furthermore I also had an affair with a lovely lady back in Chicago, who I visited quite a few times actually and kept a continued correspondence with. At one point I even met her family. She seemed like a sweet girl, but she mentioned commitment much too much and at a certain point I realized her face disgusted me. Besides, she was much too improper for a lady and spoke too much. 

I also developed other friendships. I began to grow closer to Rem and Ryuk, listening more and more to stories they had to tell and and things they had to say. Still, no matter how many times I asked Rem would not tell me what exactly L had wanted to discuss with her at the first party of his that I went too. She held it over my head in the most tantalizing way, until finally I stopped bringing it up due to the pure amount of rage it caused me. 

After one of L’s wilder parties, one where I once again managed to go a full night without speaking to the host, I finally had a lunch with Higuchi without bringing Misa along. It was a moment I had dreaded, considering how undesirable I found him as a person once we both graduated from college, but Misa desperately wanted us to get along and Rem always got irrationally angry with me whenever I made her unhappy. Furthermore, she whined like no one else I had ever met, and although I partially wanted to make her happy, I mostly wanted her to stop moping so that she wouldn’t keep trying to tell me all about how sad she was. Nothing was more uncomfortable than being in the room with a crying girl. 

Higuchi picked me up from my house in a new car that he was very proud of, and although I had originally assumed we were going to lunch at a place nearby, I soon found that he was driving me all the way into the city. The car was nearly silent as we drove to lunch, and it was nearly unbearable. I spent the ride looking at any scenery I could find, until finally we passed by the Eyes of God that seemed to watch over every sin we committed in the East and West Eggs. 

It was an old billboard, probably leftover from some advertisement from an optometrist, but that was long enough ago that all the wording and most of the paint had faded off of it, leaving nothing but a pair of large and judgmental eyes. There was no way to leave the West Egg without passing by it. 

“I can’t wait for you to meet my girl,” Higuchi said, causing me to look away from the giant eyes and back toward him again. His girl? “She’s a beauty, and her bubs are…” He trailed off, whistling as he took his hands off the wheel to use them to show me exactly how large her breasts apparently were. I wrinkled my nose in disgust as his car swerved the the left and he frantically rushed to get both hands back on the wheel to maintain his pride in being a decent driver. 

“Incredible,” I said, mustering as much false excitement as possible. 

“But the best thing about her,” He said, turning towards me before realizing I wasn’t going to make eye contact with him and turning his eyes back to the road again. It really was worrying how little he was focusing on the road. “The best thing about her is her intellect. I know it sounds like horseshit but, it’s good to be able to have a real conversation with a girl now and then, and she’s really a choice brand of calico. That’s the thing about Misa. She’s gorgeous, and a great wife, always listens and does what she’s told, has unconditional loyalty. But she just talks so much, and nothing she says has any thought put into it in the slightest.” 

“Of course.” I replied with a nod, waiting for him to get bored of this conversation and change the subject. 

“I’d never marry a girl like Takada-- that’s her name-- but that’s one of the best parts about her. She’s already married. I never even have to worry about her wanting to take the next step or wanting me to leave Misa. It’s a good gig. You oughta get yourself one, as well, Light. You don’t even know what you’re missing out on.”

“No, no I’m sure I am.” I agreed, not fully paying attention anymore. I was annoyed that what I’d thought was a plain boring lunch with an old college friend and neighbor had actually turned into a small road trip into the city to meet his ‘new girl’, but there wasn’t much I could do about it then and I wasn’t about to ask him to turn the car around and go home. 

“I slipped her a note the last time I went to their house, her husband is a lawyer, and told her to meet me at this apartment in the city. Her friend lives there. It’s a great spot!”

“Doesn’t he object?” I asked.

“Who, her husband?” He laughed. “He’s horrible. He likes to think of himself as an intellectual, probably thinks he’s smarter than me because he had a few extra years of school. He doesn’t give Takada the time of day. He just likes to show her off. He thinks she’s visiting her sister, so I guess he’s not as smart as he thinks he is.” 

I hadn’t heard Higuchi talk this much and years, and to be completely honest I liked it better when he was a silent yet dominating presence. 

“They live in a big house near here, actually. We passed it a bit back, have to drive by it to get to the city anyway, but stopping by there would only rouse suspicion and I’m not sure Mikami is the kind of man alright with someone stealing his wife.” 

Finally, after the longest car ride of my life thus far, we reached our destination. A little room in an apartment in the city on the 5th floor. Takada opened the door, throwing her arms around Higuchi as soon as he opened the door and pulling him inside. I followed. 

I could understand at least why he seemed to fancy her. She did have excellent breasts, although her haircut was cut short like a flappers. I could only assume that perhaps she used to be one, before settling down and getting married to a man who would object. She seemed to be in her mid-thirties, and  _ was  _ losing a few of her graces. Not that a man like Higuchi could do much better as he began approaching middle age. 

I didn’t bother learning the name of her friend, although she threw herself at me all night long. She had a cat, and I couldn’t stand to be around cats. No matter how much she seemed to want me, which judging by how close she sat to me and how she laughed at all of my jokes (even though half of them weren’t even meant to be jokes), her cat seemed to want me even more. It was getting cat hair all over my new suit, and it was unbearable. Apparently Higuchi had bought it for Takada’s friend to keep in her apartment, just because Takada enjoyed seeing it when they all came over. It seemed positively stupid to me. 

Altogether there ended up being about seven of us in that small room. 

Now, I’ve only been drunk twice in my entire life. I have a drink or two when I attend parties and gatherings, but I believe that getting drunk is wrong on a moral level. One of those times was on that afternoon. Everything that happened after is covered in a dim, hazy cast. Takada had changed into another dress at one point, and with it her personality seemed to change as well. It got larger, and larger, until eventually it seemed to take up the whole room. She hadn’t even left the rest of us enough space to catch our breath. 

Her friend, who I later found out was actually her sister, turned to me and asked “Do you live in Long Island?”

“No,” I answered, “West Egg.”

“Oh!” She said, as if that were the most delightful news in the entire world. “I went to a party in East Egg last week. It was hosted by a man named L, do you know him?”

“He’s my neighbor.”

“Well, they say he’s the nephew of Kaiser Willhelm. That’s where all his money comes from. Are you friends with him? Have you heard that?”

“I-I haven’t heard that,” I responded with a thin smile, absorbing the information, “Not yet.”

“I’m scared of him. I’d hate to have him get anything on me.” 

I opened my mouth to respond again, but she had grown bored of the conversation and had decided to take up the activity of watching Higuchi and Takada. She leaned close to me and whispered in my ear, “Neither of them can stand the person they’re married to.” 

“They can’t?” I replied.

She shook her head. “What I don’t understand is why keep living with someone if you can’t stand them? See, it’s his wife that’s keeping them apart. He’d divorce her in a second, but she’s Catholic, she doesn’t believe in divorce. It’s awful.” 

Misa wasn’t Catholic, and I was a little bit shocked at the elaborateness of the lie. I would have congratulated Higuchi on coming up with it if I hadn’t been so disgusted. 

“She’s miserable though, Takada,” Her sister continued, “She never used to be this miserable when we were kids. Her husband barely even lets her talk when he’s at home. He’s horribly serious, and more intense than she can handle. Not to say that he beats her or anything, I’m sure he would never do that, but...but Takada deserves someone much better. Someone who can make her happy. Higuchi makes her happy.”

Takada was laughing, sitting on his lap and smoking a cigarette as she called up another friend to tell them to come over. All I could think about is how much Misa would hate her. 

Her sister began to rest her head on my shoulder, causing me to squirm absentmindedly. “I can’t wait for them to get married. She needs it. I don’t know what she would have done to herself if she hadn’t met Higuchi,” 

Takada pulled her chair close to mine, and suddenly her warm breath poured over me the story of her first meeting with Higuchi.  
“We were next to each other on the train, in those two little seats across from each other that are always the last to get taken. I was coming up here to my sister and spend the night. He had on a dress suit and patent leather shoes, and I couldn’t keep my eyes off him, but every time he looked at me I had to pretend to be looking at the advertisement over his head. When we came into the station he was next to me, and his white shirt-front pressed against my arm, and so I told him I’d have to call a policeman, but he knew I lied. I was so excited that when I got into a taxi with him I didn’t hardly know I wasn’t getting into a subway train. All I kept thinking about, over and over, was ‘You can’t live forever; you can’t live forever.’”

It was nine o’clock — almost immediately afterward I looked at my watch and found it was ten. Time moved at weird speeds that afternoon, sometimes speeding up, sometimes slowing down. People left, and people came, and people left and then came back, and I still sat in the same spot. Watching everything. 

Eventually a fight broke out in the living room, with Takada claiming that she had every right to say Misa’s name if she wanted to. 

“Misa! Misa! Misa! Misa! Misa!” She was yelling it over and over again in Higuchi’s face. “I’ll say it whenever I want to! Misa!” 

I could tell it wouldn’t end well, but I wasn’t in any place to interfere. 

Making a short but powerful movement, Higuchi broke her nose with his open hand. I’ve always been one to get a bit sick at the sight of human blood, and amid all the commotion and arguing and tears and yelling, I slipped out the back door and headed out towards the street. 

I was drunk and my memory is hazy, so I have no clear recollection of exactly how I found myself back to the train and back to West Egg, but somehow I ended up standing on L’s doorstep, ringing the bell for the third time. 

He opened it. 

“I--” I began. What had I done? Why had I gone to his house instead of my own? I could have brushed it off as a mistake, apologized profusely and explained that I had been mixed up in my drunkenness. But no, no I’d come for a reason. I was disgusted with the world, and disgusted with those I called my friends. Higuchi’s behavior had been disgusting, It had been unacceptable. I felt almost as though I needed to be cleansed from how horrible a day I’d had, and for some reason I felt in that drunken moment as though perhaps L could cleanse me. 

“Hello.” He said, leaning against the doorframe. He was wearing a bathrobe that had opened slightly to reveal parts of his thin frame and pale chest. I was filled with a sudden urge to squeeze him until he broke. I wanted to feel every inch of his thin frame. I shut my eyes, tight. I was horribly drunk. I remembered again why I always refused to drink.

He, noticing his robe had fallen open slightly, readjusted and tightened the strings. 

“Did I--” I started, “I mean, am I bothering you? Did I call at the wrong time? I can leave.” I turned to go, but he reached out an arm to stop me.

He pulled me close to him, until I was practically inside the house, his mouth only an inch from mine. I held my breath. Then, he took a step back and burst into laughter.

“You’re drunk, aren’t you.”

I nodded, dumbly, not sure how else to respond.

“I thought you didn’t believe in all that? Thought you were better than that. Ah, well,” He said more to himself, than to me. He tugged on my arm, “Do come inside. I  _ was  _ busy but I suppose I could at least get you some tea or cake or something.”

I shook my head, embarrassed by my stupidity. I meant to come, perhaps have a conversation, maybe confront him about his mysterious past or ask what it was he’d told Rem that day, but instead I’d only made a fool of myself instead. 

“No?” He answered for me. Then he sighed. “Well, alright then. How about I at least steer you home, huh? We’ll get lunch tomorrow. I’ve been meaning to call upon you anyway. I’ll ring in the morning so you don’t forget.”

Then, he pointed me in the direction of my cottage and gave me a nice shove. When I got back to my house, I made a mental note to cancel lunch the next morning. I wasn't planning to get out of bed for the next few years. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's not a date, it's just two dudes grabbing lunch.

**** The phone rang three times before I finally got out of bed to answer it the following morning. When I finally  _ did _ drag myself out of my slumber to answer it, asking "Who is this?” in a slow, groggy tone, I was answered by an annoyingly chipper voice on the other end of the phone. 

"Who do you think it is?” L replied, “I am coming to pick you up from your house in 10 minutes. Be ready.”

I sighed, about to answer that there was no way in hell I was going to be ready in 10 minutes, before he hung up on me, leaving me nothing but silence to complain to. 

Well, if I kept him waiting it was his own damn fault. 

I stumbled into my room, throwing on the first shabby suit I could find and smoothing my hair back to a style that was at least manageable. I was not half as beautiful as I normally tried to be, but it would have to do. 10 minutes was not nearly enough time for me to complete my normal 45 minute morning routine. I thought in that moment that I might never forgive L for making me skip it. 

When he finally arrived, it was in a horrendous new yellow car that he jumped out of and gestured to with big sweeping arm motions. "See this beauty? Cost me a fortune, but she is worth every penny. Impressive, correct?” 

"Uh… She seems great?” I offered, trying to sound as convincing as possible. My father has always told me that at times like those it was always better to either say something nice, or say nothing at all. Considering how excited the millionaire looked, I felt something nice was necessary even if I disagreed with every fiber of my being. The car was hideous. That was all there was to it.

The car ride was spent mainly with me listening to him talking, and although I’d expected a bunch of bullshit, I was pleasantly surprised to find that most of what he said was actually shockingly intelligent. I found myself fascinated with the stories that he had to tell.

After a bit, L asked me a strange question. “Listen here, old sport, what’s your opinion of me anyhow?”

“Huh?” I asked, confused about what exactly he wanted me to say.

“What do you think of me? Completely honestly, I won’t mind if you rip me to shreds. I’m only curious.” 

“Well…” I began, “I-I don’t know you very well, so I couldn’t say for sure. You’re intelligent, well off, and you have me intrigued. But…” I stopped, wondering if I should say the thought that had popped into my head. I sighed, and decided to anyway. “Your taste is somewhat lacking. This car is a horrible color.” 

To my surprise, he actually laughed. I suppose he thought it was a joke that I hated his car, so I decided to not go any further in convincing him otherwise.

“I’m going to tell you something about myself, a few things actually, just to clear up all these stories that I know you’ve probably been hearing about me and my past. I’ve never murdered anyone, I’m not a German spy nor have I ever been, and I didn’t make my fortune by breaking the law.” 

“Oh?” I asked. “I didn’t think--”

He interrupted me before I could finish. “I grew up in the midwest--” 

I was surprised to hear this. It seemed a strange coincidence. “Where in the midwest? I’m from there myself. Grew up in Minnesota.” 

“San Francisco.” He replied in complete seriousness.

I stared at him for a few seconds, waiting for him to reveal that it was a joke so that I could laugh at it and break the awkwardness, but the reveal never came. 

“Oh.” I replied with a stiff nod. “Fascinating.” 

“An incredible coincidence,” L said before continuing, “But anyway, my parents were very wealthy, but they died when I was young and I inherited all their fortune. When I came of age I joined the war, then I went to Oxford for my education. A few years late, but I’ve always said better late than never as far as learning new things is concerned, although I’ve always tried to look at my entire life as one big learning experience. I’m proud to be an Oxford man. My father went to Oxford, and so did his father, and my grandfather as well. It’s always been a family tradition, actually.” 

So he  _ was _ an Oxford man, which made sense once I’d thought about it. Sure, he was odd, but most men who have spent any amount of time in Europe were, and he was actually frighteningly intelligent. In fact, after a few conversations with him I realized he had an intellect that might have even rivaled my own, despite his backwards belief that San Francisco could possibly be a part of the US. 

“After that, I traveled the world. I went to all the major European capitals. London, Paris, Venice, Rome, you name it. I collected jewels, wealth, women, although to be frank with you I was mainly trying to forget something very sad that happened to me in my past that I don’t much like to talk about.” 

For a moment, I almost ceased to believe him. There was something about the way he talked about these things that made them seem...well... _untrue_. 

“Here, reach in my pocket,” He said. 

Was he serious? I glanced down at his pocket, attempting to hide the slight blush coming across my face at the slightly inappropriate request. If the request was inappropriate, however, he didn’t seem to notice in the slightest. I reached over as he kept his eyes and both hands on the road and pulled his wallet out of his pants, assuming that was what he had been wanting.

“Open it up. There’s a picture inside it.”

I opened it up to see a picture of a group of boys. L was there, front and center, looking slightly younger but overall much the same. I was amazed with him, all doubt leaving my mind. I’d half to tell Rem and Ryuk, they’d dropped some hints that L’s stories weren’t lining up before. 

“That’s the old Oxford gang,” He explained, “Most of us were old war buddies as well, though I suppose most of us have fought in the war, huh? I won a medal, too, actually. Major L Lawliet-- that’s what it says. Here, we’re almost to the city.” 

When we got to the city, L took me to a 42-street cellar for lunch. It was a nice enough restaurant, but I couldn’t complain considering L had offered to pay. 

He ordered a strawberry shortcake and four chocolate cupcakes, plus an entire mocha layer cake. I had chicken a la rose and a salad. The oddest part of the whole meal, however, wasn’t the fact that he ordered an entire table of desserts for just him, but the way that he sat. He crouched on his chair like he was about to pounce, which didn’t even seem to me like it could be even the slightest bit comfortable. I glanced around the restaurant to see if anyone else was watching us, but no one seemed to be paying us any mind. 

“Are you going to order lunch?” I asked.

“I did.” He gestured to the strawberry that he was pinching between his fingers. “I’m eating it right now. I find that as long as you use your brain enough, you don’t gain any weight.” 

I might not be a scientist but even I knew that was the stupidest load of fucking bullshit I’d ever heard. I smiled and nodded. “Fascinating.” 

“Now tell me, Light.” He liked icing off one of his fingers and leaned in closer to me. “Are you familiar with the classics?” 

“More or less. I studied them at Yale,” I replied. “Homer, Virgil, Caesar. I used to know quite a bit of latin.”

“Used to?” L asked. 

“It’s a dead language,” I shrugged, “I haven’t used it since.”

“Not even for a reread of a favorite classic?”

“In the original language?” I scoffed.

“Why not?” He asked. “I’ve been prone to glance at The Iliad from time to time. Achilles and Patroclus have  _ such  _ a fascinating dynamic.” 

“I have better things to do with my time.”

He smiled, “Like get drunk and show up at my house unexpected late at night?” 

I stabbed my side salad with my fork as he laughed. 

I scowled, “Why do you ask, anyway?”  

He raised his eyebrows. “You stood out to me from the party of mine you went to. Not a lot of guests do that. Then again, not a lot of guests barge into my private study and demand to have a conversation with me either. Still, you piqued my interests. I’m curious about your opinions on the ancient greek concept of natural law. You seemed to have an opinion about prohibition. I wonder how much of that was influenced by your studies of jurisprudence?” 

“Those are big words for someone with a library full of uncut books, Mr. Lawliet.” I sighed. “It’s a complicated question to dissect over lunch. I’m sure many of those strongly in favor of prohibition would argue that the law is just as it is based on morality and ethics. The greeks did seem to agree that natural laws are laws that should be the same everywhere, as their basis is on fundamental moral principles. I, however, would not equate having a glass of wine to the same level of depravity as murder and thievery. It seems to me that prohibition is based more on divine law than anything else. I’m sure that certain moral laws do transcend culture, time, and government, but I doubt prohibition is one of those laws. I would be surprised if it lasted longer than a short phase of our history, considering the backlash.” 

“Really?” L asked.

“You seem surprised.” 

“I am.” He took a bit of cake. “You were quick to call me out on my ‘willful violation of prohibition” at my little gathering.” 

“Hm, you have an excellent memory I see,” I didn’t break eye contact with him. “Just because I disagree with a law doesn’t mean I believe it’s okay to break it.” 

He blinked. “And yet you showed up to my house drunk and uninvited.” I wished he would stop bringing that moment up again. 

“Everyone makes mistakes.” 

“If it was a mistake, why are you here now?” He set down his fork. 

I blinked, but otherwise didn’t break eye contact. I had a brilliant answer to the question. What was so wrong with accepting an offer to go to lunch, anyway? I was invited, after all. He knew that wasn’t what I meant, but I still felt put on the spot. I squirmed slightly in my seat. 

Finally, I found the words to reply. “I wasn’t about to turn down a free lunch, was I?”

He finally looked away, picking his napkin up off the table and wiping the corner of his mouth. “No, I suppose not.” 

Just as I was searching for an appropriate thing to change the subject to, the uncomfortableness of the situation was broken by a stranger who had suddenly pulled up a chair and thrown an arm around L. 

“Erm, Mr. Yagami?” L said, looking up at the man behind him and then back at me, “This is my friend Mihael Keehl.” 

L’s friend was a short Russian with a bad blonde bob cut and absolutely no taste. He was wearing an excessive amount of leather with a large fur coat, almost as if he were trying his hardest to be as close to a male flapper as he possibly could. He took a big bite of a chocolate bar that seemed to appear out of nowhere, and looked to Light with a firm nod. 

“Is this the man?” He asked L, raking over me with his eyes. Then he turned behind him and gestured to a redhead at a table nearby with fashion choices that were almost just as questionable. “Jeevas! Get the hell over here!” 

“Light?” L asked, “Oh no, no, definitely not, no, absolutely not. Just a nice lunch with a friend. I promise we’ll talk about it another time.”

“Oh.” He seemed disappointed. “I suppose I had the wrong man.” 

The man Mihael had called Jeevas finally arrived, asking “What did I miss?” and taking a huge swig of L’s water. He wrinkled his nose. “Disgusting. What percentage is this?”

“It’s water,” L said, “And this is a false alarm. This is just a friend.” 

I looked around the room, mainly to keep myself from staring at one of them, and that’s when I spotted Higuchi. Fantastic. I go out for one afternoon and suddenly we both run into everyone we’ve ever known. 

“Speaking of friends,” I tapped L’s hand, “My old college buddy Higuchi is here. He’s married to my cousin.” 

“I’ll be right back,” L said almost simultaneously, rushing out of the room and leaving me alone with his two friends, “I believe I have a phone call.” 

Before I could say a word about it he was gone. I looked up at the other two who still seemed to be staring at me. I immediately got the wrong vibe from the two of them. They were looking at me like they wanted to eat me alive.

“Er...have you known L long?”

“I’ve known him for several years,” Mihael said, “And Jeevas has known him for just a few years less. I met him right after the war. It took less than an hour of talking to him for me to realize that he was one of the finest men I’d ever met. He’s the kind of man anyone would be proud to introduce to their mother and sister.” 

Jevas looked me over again. “Congratulations.” He said. 

I was about to ask him what he was congratulating me for when Mihael continued talking, “He’s an Oxford man you know. He went to Oxford. Have you heard of it?” 

“I’ve heard of it.”

“It’s one of the most famous colleges in the world,” Jeevas added. 

What, did they think I was born yesterday? 

“Anyway,” Mihael continued, “L has very noble ideas about women, as well, although I’m sure you know all about that.” 

“Yes, well…” I trailed off, not sure how to respond. Thankfully, L saved me with his return.

Jeevas grabbed Mihael’s hand, saying, “We should probably get back to our own lunch, shouldn’t we Mello?” 

“Yes, of course,” He replied, “If you’ll excuse me.” 

L looked after them as they went. 

“They were the ones who fixed the world series back in 1919, you know.”

“Oh?” I’d known the world series was fixed, of course, but I guess I assumed it had been done by a wider organization. 

“Why isn’t he in jail?” I asked.

“Simple, old sport. He’s not stupid enough to get caught.” Just as he was sitting down again, Higuchi finally spotted us from across the room, practically jumping up to say hello. 

“Higuchi!” I said, mustering as much fake enthusiasm as I could. “What a coincidence to see you here.”

“Where have you been?” He asked, “Misa won’t stop asking about when you’ll come round again.”

I ignored the question. “Higuchi, this is L. L, Higuchi.” 

They shook hands, and a look of discomfort came across L’s face like I had never seen before, especially not on him. 

“What are you doing all the way out here, anyhow?” He asked. 

“I’m just having lunch with Mr. Lawliet.” I turned to gesture to him again, only to discover that he’d disappeared. “Ah, excuse me, did you see where he went?” 

“Uh…”

I didn’t want for his answer, but quickly waved goodbye and walked out of the room. 

The car ride back was spent mostly in silence, until finally L said “Can I be completely honest with you, Light?”

“Nothing’s stopped you before now.” 

“I didn’t take you out today just for lunch, I need a favor from you.”

I groaned. Of course. “What do you want?” 

“I heard you were taking tea with Rem this week?” 

“Word travels fast, huh? Well what is it, are you in love with her or something? Do you need me to put a word in?”

He looked disgusted. “God, no, it’s not like that. But she  _ has  _ agreed to talk to you about the matter.”

“What matter?” I was beginning to grow impatient.

“Well...I don’t feel extremely comfortable discussing it here and now.”

“I didn’t set foot on your overpopulated lawn, Mr. Lawliet, just so that I can talk to Rem about you over tea.” I said, more annoyed than interested. 

“But will you?” He asked again. 

I didn’t answer right away, but he didn’t press the question. We sat in silence for a little longer before I finally acquiesced. “Sure.” 

He grinned. “Fantastic! It really has been a great afternoon, hasn’t it?”

When he finally did drop me off in front of my house, his gaze lingered on me a bit longer than was necessary. “Let’s do this again sometime, alright? No need to be strangers.”

I nodded, and smiled as well, previous frustration forgotten. 

“And feel free to get drunk and visit me in my bathrobe any time you need to.” 

I coughed, shocked that those words had come out of his mouth. I didn’t quite understand his sense of humor. I was beginning to grow embarrassed that he’d mentioned it again. It didn’t seem quite fair to me to keep joking about it. 

Then again, I wasn’t entirely sure he was joking, and I wasn’t entirely sure I minded. 

He drove off. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> sorry  
> (if you want to yell at me on tumblr, my username is llawlietofficial and I have regrets)


End file.
